Doom and gloom

So, there's a colleague of mine who for paperwork reasons became aware that I was doing IVF. She was really sweet about it, warmly wishing me luck. A few months later, she turned up pregnant for the first time (how do I know it was her first time? Because she announced it immediately. Women who've had a miscarriage don't do that.). She's in her mid-40s.

It was not a great leap for me to conclude that she had had fertility treatments, quite possibly donor egg, and that it was a long road for her to get there. She was due in November.

The other night, lying awake I suddenly thought "What ever happened to Nice Colleague's baby?  I never heard anything about... oh, god." I checked her online registry and only a very few things had been purchased.

And I lay there for a while, thinking about the fact that I don't know her well enough to sally up and say "hey, dead baby or what?" and feeling awful that at the end of what was probably a long journey, things turned out badly. And hurting for her for what it must have been like socially, given that she told everyone and then some.

So the next day I went to my friend who knows her a bit better and said, "hey, what about Nice Colleague's baby?" My friend furrowed her brow and said "Ummm... Ella? No, that's not it. Katie."

And that was that. Katie is fine. She was just low-key about it, didn't announce the birth to the whole world I guess, maybe had another registry someplace else or had friends who liked to buy things off-registry. She's fine. They're both fine. She and her husband are new parents.

I was staggered with relief. And then I thought huh, maybe I should try not to jump directly from didn't see a birth announcement  to oh, dead baby.

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In other news, having an HSG next month to see if my pathetic periods are because my adhesions have returned, or because of who knows what. Please no adhesions. I would really rather not have to do all that again.