Highway TTC: Beta #4

Monday, November 28, 2011

Beta #4

567, for a doubling time of.... 105 hours.

Yeah, it's over.

Thanks for stopping by, hope.

I guess, technically speaking, this will be a chemical, not a miscarriage. Hurts a lot more than the last one did, though.

I can't believe how well and truly fooled I was by that early, dark test. Bitter!me says: I can't believe I fell for that.

Now I just have to hope it's not ectopic.

I fucking hate the next few steps, to wit:

The passing of the physical products of conception
The bills for the failed cycle come rolling in.

Fuck.

5 comments:

AnonymousNovember 28, 2011 at 12:49 PM
Oh no! So sorry to hear this. It sucks that things dragged on for so long without any clarity. And it sucks that there will be the physical and financial things to deal with to make sure you don't forget.
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nutellaNovember 28, 2011 at 1:04 PM
Sorry just isn't enough, but still. So very sorry.
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VeeNovember 28, 2011 at 6:48 PM
Fuck indeed. I'm sorry, friend.
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juliane2004November 28, 2011 at 10:28 PM
I'm sorry. :( Are you going to get another beta?
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AnonymousNovember 29, 2011 at 10:15 PM
I'm so, so sorry. My heart hurts.
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The story to date

7/15 Said adios to the embryos. We shall remain a family of three.
12/13 Hanging up the stirrups for at least 6 months. Let's see how much I miss 'em.
9/13 FET#5. Low but doubling betas, and then a subchorianic bleed presages the end. M/c.
7/13 FET#4. BFN.
10/12 FET#3. BFP at 4dp5dt, yay! Excellent betas, yay! Heartbeat at 6 weeks, yay! Heartbeat at 7 weeks, yay! No heartbeat at 8 weeks. Not-yay. Diagnosis: intrauterine death of identical twins. Sigh. Ended pregnancy with misoprostol.
5/12 Asherman's surgery
4/12 IVF#4 -- freeze-all cycle, pre-Asherman's surgery. 9 blasts in the freezer, woo hoo!
3/12 Diagnosed with Asherman's Syndrome (uterine scarring and adhesions). Surgery scheduled for 5/12.
11/11 FET #2.5, with stims to improve lining. Worked! Transfer of 2 6-day blasts; fairly dark BFP at 4dp5dt. A non-doubling beta dragged us through beta hell. Non-viable; D&C at 7w3d.
9/11-10/11 FET #2 canceled for bad attitude on the part of my endometrium.
7/11 So much fun, we couldn't stay away! FET: Estrogen-progesterone only programmed cycle. The day after Small Boy's birthday, we transfer two defrosted embryos, 3BB blastocysts. Chemical.
7/09 Our little boy is born. thankyouthankyouthankyou
3/09 Nuchal scan and 18 week ultrasound all normal. Boy parts are located! Halfway through and holding our breath, but so grateful to be here.
10/08-11/08 IVF #3. Bizarre cycle: underresponse, raised dose, WHOAH NELLIE. Great quality embryos, mediocre quality embryos, oh hey they look great again! 8 blasts frozen on day 6 -- woo hoo!! World's faintest BFP at 4dp5dt; something more convincing at 5dp5dt.
9/08 Well-timed single IUI. BFN. Begin IVF #3.
6/08-8/08 IVF#2. Lowered dose, lousy response, 3 day transfer of a compacting embryo. Negative.
6/08 finally ovulated, 5.5 weeks post m/c. Ill-timed IUI. Hope springs eternal. Hope comes down to earth with a thump; negative.
5/08 a plunging beta and miscarriage at 6w4d. Feh.
2/08-4/08 a madcap whirl of injections and ultrasound wands, culminating in a single-embryo transfer of a 4AA blast. Positive only 5 days past transfer! Nasty case of OHSS. Not great but not horrible betas, nevertheless concluding with...
1/08 decide to cut to the chase and do IVF.
12/07 another IUI. Unpositive
11/07 bought sperm off-the-shelf, IUI. Negatory.
9/07 discovered that known donor had a low sperm count.
6/07 began monitoring cycles with an RE.
1/07: began TTC with known donor, via FedEx.

Highway TTC

Monday, November 28, 2011

Beta #4

5 comments:

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